It was past assembly time and well into the first period. Leo has just gotten onto his seat filled with dread of starting a whole new day of boredom and his over-aged teachers. He slowly reached for his bag to the right and started taking out the required books for this subject.
“Chemistry” a deeper feeling of hopelessness plunged into his stomach. The lecturer responsible for this massacre would be Professor Henry. Apparently, he finished his PhD in the 1960s and have sparked the life of many young chemists with this teaching skills.
“Maybe 10 years ago,” Leo thought. “Oi, you off again? C’mon the finals are months away; we need to get our head straight” said Lilith. Lilith, the girl that somehow thinks that she has a hold over what Leo does or feels just because they grew up together. Leo still remembers the first day they met, oh how he wished he would have just stayed at home playing a game that day instead of going to the park.
Black hair, black eyes and black soul, that was all Lilith was made out of. Her parents have picked the perfect name for her, the mother of Adam’s demonic offspring. If some people met her and she was mute, they would probably think that she was attractive and had a good personality. Her eyes were beautiful, Leo thought, but it was the only feature that could be compensated for her other disastrous qualities. Her eyelashes? Fake. Her skin tone? Fake. Lipstick at a class at 9 am? Check. A lot of time and money has been spent on the way she is now. Pity, she had potential, but materialism has taken a toll on this poor soul.
Startled Leo gave her a mean look as if she has just taken the escape he was chasing with her high-pitched annoying voice. “I told you not to do that, I need to get into the right mindset to study.”
“No, you gaze off into god knows where and don’t respond to anyone, it’s very annoying and creepy when you stare at the teacher with your mouth open,” said Lilith giggling. “You won’t understand it, only people with high IQ can ever understand what happens in our minds” Leo snarled back.
Lilith nodded Leo to come forward and started to whisper with suspense, “Honestly sometimes I think I should just call you Loony Leo” and backed down chuckling with her annoying voice.
Rage came and went around Leo’s ears but he suppressed it and started laughing. Maybe containing this anger isn’t healthy, however, he would need to contain his emotions in this self-driven society to maintain humanity. Being Human, how interesting.
Leo closed his eyes and instantly he was where he wanted to be. The energy from his rage has enabled him to shut everything down and stare at himself on an imaginary mirror. A messy-haired boy looked back and stared at him. His eyes were as black as someone looking into an endless hole with nothing in the bottom. The state of his clothes was less than tidy as to his belief, dressing up and looking nice for School of all things, is a total sham. He wasn’t over or underweight and he loved it that way. With broad shoulders and an above-average height, he smirked back at himself and got ready to feel nothingness.
He slid back to reality for last time checking everything just as someone would check their pockets or wallet before taking drugs and getting high. The teachers monotonous voice can act like bells on the top of the mountain. As Henry started introducing the class to organic chemistry, Leo stared at the board and straightened up. It was time.
He started without blinking, transfixed on the board and sat up straight, frozen still with his hands on the desk. He needed attention and obedience now, he needed to concentrate. As his eyes filled up with water, everything around him started going dark. Slowly the clumsy chatter of the classroom started tuning out along with Henry’s long and brutal lecture. A faint ringing started to voice itself from Leo’s ears. He wasn’t moving, no, he needed complete order.
His brain started to think that he was falling asleep due to the unresponsive body, and right on queue came this unbearable itch on his hands. That’s right brain, fall right into my trap. If Leo can ignore Lilith’s unbearable humour this itch is a walk in the park. Sure enough, his body fell completely silent and the blackness around him engulfed around his visions.
It was finally him all alone, the world with time itself stood still while he stared into the blackness similar to his eyes. The bliss was amazing. What to do now? He needed to keep his mind busy, he needed to keep pouring oil to this amazing train his brain was driving. With what? His ever-longing urge to strangle Lilith?
No, positive thoughts, he thought. Music. It was as if his mind has instantly heard him and classical music started playing whilst he was on this golden train roaming in the galaxy. He looked around him, the interior of the train was amazing and his immediate favourite. Why not, he thought, It was his creation after all. Maybe God feels the same way about humans? Maybe we are just a thought in His mind right now?
He shrugs away as soon as he understands that he needs to keep this train going. He looked around the train again, classy wooden interior with comfortable seating and appropriate lighting which is not too bright. The lighting was so perfect that it felt like it slowly fell upon all the interiors like the shadow of loved ones calling us after we are dead. Beautiful and peaceful, and alone with no one to bother the journey of this train, Leo thought. As he started outside from his window on this single seated train, he saw the image of the galaxy around him. The stars blinking and changing colours and a slight light following their pathway due to the high speed of the train. The colours and comets all swirled and whirled around him to his will. Why would anyone want reality when they have this? But then again reality gave me the concept of galaxies and planets, to begin with, maybe I should be grateful.
His eyes closed shut, he begins to feel a warm blanket trying to keep him warm as if he was in a cold winter morning by the fireplace. Truly this feeling of gratefulness was so much better when he was alone, undisturbed and able to stop time to savour it to his fullest extent. He felt refreshed, replenished and fuzzy all around.
“Henry’s asking something” whispered Lilith.
In a single second, his whole train plunges into a dark hole and the warm fuzzy feeling gets replaced by an astounding amount of anger for both Lilith and Professor Henry. Why can’t anyone leave me the hell alone?
“Now Leo, l will repeat myself for the last time! Stop dozing off in class. Come and draw the structural formula of Ethanol on the board.” Said, Henry.
You should come up with something better if you are trying to set an example by trying to ridicule me in front of my classmates’ old man, thought Leo as he put up a fake smile on his face and said, “certainly Professor”.
As he started walking towards the board he thought about the molecular formula, C2H5OH. This is going to be so easy, maybe I can get some peace after this. He took the board marker from Henry’s hand and drew it up as fast as he could. “May I please be excused to the toilet?” said Leo, with his fake smile still on.
Taken aback, Henry nodded and let Leo leave.
He couldn’t get out of there faster, stupid Lilith bringing me back to this stupid place with her annoying little voice. Maybe I can kill her one day when she comes over? No, I am too young for murder. Dark humour, love it. Thought Leo.
He reached the toilet doors and opened them. It was empty; everyone was in class. He locked the door and started washing his face. There was something about water that calmed him, the way it ran through his fingers, the cool feeling of it touching his skin. He quickly collected some more water with both his hands and washed his face, he took some more and ran it through his hair. To any onlookers, it would seem as if the water and Leo were making love. He took some more and closed his eyes, enjoying this everlasting feeling of love and affection. It almost feels like he was back on the train.
